Contact Us

The Rangers deserve the 2005 "What the hell are you thinking?" award

December 27, 2005 | By Dennis Bakay | Discuss

The Rangers have given former Phillies (disappointment) pitcher, Kevin “Deadwood” Millwood $12 million, count 'em $12 million per season. This was his reward for one good season, following his 2-year “stint” in Philadelphia. Granted, he led the American League (which is not friendly to pitchers) in ERA. However, did anyone see the footage from his 2003-2004 seasons in Philadelphia? Did anyone from the Rangers front office see the infamous scene of Millwood sweating like a pig as he sat on a lawn chair in the leadoff deck during a sultry game?!

For, we were duped in Philadelphia. The lure of the siren was master-GM John Schuerholtz's offer of Millwood for Johnny Estrada. We were further duped when Millwood tossed a no-hitter in his first month in a Phillies uniform. Little would we know, this would be the pinnalce achievement for the pitcher known in these parts as "Deadwood." There were countless crucial games during the 03-04 campaigns, when Millwood would take the reigns as the so-called ace of the Phillies, only to give up 5 or 6 runs. Thereby, stretching the bullpen like Johnny Wad Holmes would do to his female counterpart in a porn scene.

This is what the Rangers fans can expect out of Millwood during the two-years he'll stay there before he is jettisoned, as I predict. They can expect a 13-12 record with a 4.80-5.00 ERA. This is hardly ace material. Added to that, he's in the American League as well. Yes, he had a career year with the Indians, but it was during a contract year. Again, it's the lure of the siren. When the Rangers have a key divisional match-up against the likes of Bartolo Colon or Barry Zito in late-July they won't see Millwood sweating in a lawn chair on the leadoff deck (luckily for them since he won't bat in the AL), rather they'll see him marching off the mound having given up 6 runs in 5 innings. The Rangers should expect nothing less than mediocrity for his $12 million annual salary.

 

Writer Details

Dennis Bakay

Dennis Bakay has been a writer since the ripe old age of 6 when he created imaginative Sci-fi stories. He got into sports writing when he was in high school and went on to become the sports editor of the high school paper in his senior year. Upon graduation he went on to Shippensburg University for two years where he became interested in writing screenplays and directing movies. While working on several screenplays he got his first directing gig in his sophomore year and directed a one-act play of a movie you may have heard of called Pulp Fiction. He got in touch with Quentin Tarantino's assistant and she acquiesced saying it was ok to do it as long as no profit was made. Thus, Bakay directed the segment of Pulp Fiction called The Bonnie Situation, when Jules and Vincent had a little cleaning up to do. Added to that, Bakay made his acting debut by portraying The Wolf. The play received huge acclaim and was good preparation for his move to Temple's film school program the next year. Bakay was known for his bizarre movies, which rivaled those of David Lynch's earlier short movies. His best known movie was a political mudslinging commercial where Sonny Bono's wife Mary Bono, Former Washington D.C. Mayor Marion Berry, and a Catholic priest James Cain III were running for president. He made many other short films in college and wrote his first completed screenplay in 2002 entitled Silent Thunder which is a labyrinthine Sci-fi/Horror movie which delves inside the mind. It is Clockwork Orange meets Being John Malkovich meets Jack the Ripper.


Bakay founded Phillypurge.com in the summer of 2004 after becoming fed up with the litany of bad moves by former Phillies GM Ed Wade. It all started when he posted an Ebay auction in which he was selling Ed Wade. And, his baby has slowly evolved into what it is today with a staff of a half dozen regular contributors and an additional half dozen contributors.

Phillypurge.com was founded with the frustrated and tortured Philadelphia fans in mind (who are beaten down by the losing) as a philly sports fan site to not only get the news from people who feel their pain, but to get a wide-ranging set of opinions from writers who focus on Philadelphia and national news.

With the Fan Purge section Phillypurge.com offers Phiadelphia sports fans a place to really be heard and have their ideas seen by all.

Visit me at www.myspace.com/dennisbakay

PhillyPurge Latest Forum Threads